


The Pure Flame of my Everlasting Sins

by little_ast



Category: Lalin’s Curse (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Felix regrets everything tbh, Guilt, Mentions of Suicide, Other, Regret, Snow, Winter, everyones prolly ooc, forehead kisses yee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-28 15:00:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17185178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_ast/pseuds/little_ast
Summary: Felix has had many regrets. And it’s his own job to repent for them, whether it causes pain for him or not.





	The Pure Flame of my Everlasting Sins

**Author's Note:**

> Ack Im sorry- this was written in a rush when I was bored @~@

Beep. Beep. Beep. 

The monotonous sound of the all too familiar heartbeat monitor resounded around the sterile hospital room, my head resting against my hands- my elbows anchored to my knees as I looked down to the floor. 

I’ve never liked the hospital. For as long as I could remember, I’ve had to go to the hospital for my inconvenient heart issues- sometimes staying there for days. The heavy scent of medicine throughout the halls of the hospital, the busyness of the doctors and nurses- always gave me a headache. 

But.... I was here for a special reason. 

I sighed as I lifted my head up to look at the boy on the hospital bed. His ash blonde hair was spread across the bed, his eyes closed as he softly snored. If it weren’t for the bandages wrapped around his head, it would almost seem like he’s peacefully sleeping.....

That was all I could see before guilt ate me up too quickly, forcing myself to look away. Every time I look at him.... I just think of that same pained face, right on the bridge......

==================================

It was a snowy day in December, the bits of ice slowly fluttering onto my face as I biked through the forest trail. I could see my own breath in front of my face, the sides of my head cold from exposure to the cold air. I buried my face up to my cheeks into my red scarf, shivering.  
As I biked through the bridge, the sound of the babbling river below, I heard a sound....

It sounded like..... a sob.

”Eh...?” I hummed in curiosity, turning my head towards the edge of the snowy bridge, where I heard the sob come from. What I saw made me immediately freeze in my tracks, as frozen as the snow around me.

It was... a boy with ash blonde hair, leaving his shoes on the bridge as he stepped towards the edge. His small figure was huddled up in his coat, his body seeming as frail as my own....  
When I saw the eyes of the boy.... I could only describe them as the eyes of a dead man. They were a cold and lifeless light brown, devoid of almost any emotion other than sorrow. I saw tears stream down his face, as he stepped closer to the edge.

I gasped, immediately getting off of my bike and stepping towards the boy- no, David, “No-! What are you doing?!”

“Ah!” Surprise seemed to fill David’s face as he turned towards me- and all of a sudden, a rush of anger seemed to pool into those formerly lifeless eyes.  
Before he could chew me out, though, he seemed to slip in the snow “Ah-!”

All I can remember after that is jumping off of the bridge, my hand outstretched towards David before a rush of freezing cold engulfing my body.

==================================

I looked out of the hospital window, looking down at the world below. The bustling crowds of people, the bright and vibrant Christmas lights filling the streets as snow fluttered down from the sky.... I wished I was a part of that world. 

I sighed, looking down at my red scarf.... it still felt damp from the chilling water of the river. It felt like a constant reminder of my sins. I could almost still feel David’s struggle as I had been egged on to wrap it around his neck....

This scarf was as dirtied and sinful as I was. 

I looked over at David, for once... not feeling that same guilty feeling as strongly. He was breathing softly in his sleep, his hair covering a part of his bandaged forehead. He looked so peaceful.... so pure....

I slowly unwrapped my damp scarf from my neck, folding it up neatly into a square as I gently put it on David’s bedside table. Even as a reminder of the past.... it was something to keep David warm. Keep him safe. 

His safety..... that’s all that matters. Even if he hates my guts, even if he wants me dead for what I’ve done- I WILL protect him, no matter what. 

After all- even with his concussion, he still had a chance of a long and fulfilling life.... I put a hand on my chest. My heart condition.... it has always left my fate uncertain, but even with that- I made up my resolve. 

I walked up to the unconscious David, his hand lying on his chest. I gently grabbed his hand, gripping it within my fingers... it felt so warm. So *alive*. Like a comforting flame. I knew that I had wanted to keep this flame alive.   
I gently brushed away David’s hair from his face.... I wanted to at least give David some form of apology, even if he wouldn’t be awake for it. I leaned down, sealing my lips down onto David’s bandaged forehead. 

That kiss on his forehead... left a pleasant warmth that spread throughout my body, slowly. It was almost like I couldn’t feel the chilling dampness of my clothing. 

I’m sorry.... you may not forgive me, David... but even if I have done so many wrong things to you, so many sins... I swear on my life that I will protect you within every bit of my power. 

“Even if it’s the last thing I do.”


End file.
